The Brain

Fans of mad scientists and tentacled thingies will no doubt find favour with The Brain, a late 80s off-the-grid Canadian horror positioned around the mysterious, furtive goings on at the Psychology Research Institute, or PRI.

PRI is the “brain”, uh…child of one Dr. Blakely, a smooth self-help guru and smarmy host of Independent Thinkers, a popular cable TV show. The doc takes on a patient, Jim Majelewski, a juvenile delinquent with a hairline that’s anything but, an incorrigible high school prankster whose folks are completely flummoxed about how he’s pissing away his future and are desperate for an intervention, however unorthodox.

In the lab the doc, square jawed David Gale of Re-Animator fame, hooks young Jim up to a giant, gooey, pulsating cerebrum and soon, the youngster is being plagued by hallucinations, which spectacularly come to life at his girlfriend’s place of employment, a fried chicken joint.

After a few locals are murdered (including one via chainsaw a la Lucio Fulci’s Touch of Death), investigating officers point fingers at the increasingly erratic Jim, who is on the lam (actually, there’s probably too much driving in this one, think Once Upon a Time in Hollywood, minus the fun soundtrack and Brad Pitt).

The townsfolk, meanwhile, are becoming increasingly entranced by the satellite signals emanating from the lab and via TV screens. Or something. It’s very Invasion of the Body Snatchers, thematically if not in terms of execution.

Still, fans of tax shelter Canadian horrors will definitely get a few kicks out of this one, as will fans of super fan practical effects-centric flicks like The Video Dead or Brain Damage.

***1/4 (out of 5)

Dark Night of the Scarecrow

As The Simpsons put it, “there’s no justice like angry mob justice,” and vigilantism is the thrust of Dark Night of the Scarecrow, which along with Duel, is easily one of the best made-for-TV horror flicks ever. That might seem like faint praise — like being the brightest bulb at a psychics’ conventions — but give credit where it’s due. After all, there was a time these kinds of films were all the rage.

Dark Night of the Scarecrow is set in a rural Ventura County, California with local yokels casting a suspicious eye on Bubba, the town simpleton. When a young girl is mauled by a dog, townies use it as an excuse to track down the supposed culprit. They hop in a pickup truck, and act as judge, jury and executioner, pumping lead into the poor fellow who’s hiding in a cornfield, disguised as a scarecrow.

The foursome stages the crime scene for self-defence, placing a pitchfork in the cold, dead hands of the deceased. And apparently, this town isn’t much for forensics or due diligence, and the kangaroo court exonerates the vigilantes.

The grieving mother, warns the mob, “You may think that you’re getting off free, but there’s other justice in this world, besides the law!”

The plot is orchestrated by a devious mailman, a la Seinfeld’s Newman, played with scenery-gnawing glee by Charles Durning (The Sting/Dog Day Afternoon) who soon finds himself compelled to listen to increasingly paranoid tales spun by his collaborators about the sudden and creepy appearance of a scarecrow in their fields.

When one member of their ranks stumbles into a piece of farm equipment, killing him, the surviving parties begin to wonder if they’re being haunted from beyond the grave, by a vengeful scarecrow seeking justice for Bubba.

This might sound, well, kinda corny and while Dark Night of the Scarecrow veers uncomfortably into hicksploitation territory at times, there’s absolutely no denying the sinister, chromatic score, nor the serious chiaroscuro atmosphere. The darks are very dark and very foreboding, as this was back when horror film directors were unafraid to let audiences use their imagination to fill in the details, instead of lighting night scenes like they red carpet galas.

And there’s a terrific, claustrophobic death involving one of the characters being suffocated in a grain silo.

***1/2 (out of 5)